Your partner expects defense. They speak words of unhappiness and the natural response is self-protection. Ego over relationship every time.
Yet, ironically, if your ego is stable and the relationship is important to you, you can throw your partner off – in a good way, of course.
“Yes, Honey, you are right. I did …
… Raise my voice with the kids.”
… Forget to take out the garbage.”
… Neglect to call and tell you I was running late.”
You get the idea. Own your part. Give him/her what they aren’t expecting. And, immediately, you will experience their relief. In taking one for the team, they feel validated. They aren’t crazy and you are willing to put him/her and your relationship over your need to be self-protective.
Wow. A true relational miracle.
Go forth and try it.
Let me know how it goes.
Giving it one more chance.