What are you avoiding?

What are you avoiding?

What are you avoiding? Before my father died, we had a running joke. “Don’t be a wimp!” he’d write in his barely-legible handwriting, when writing letters was still a thing. The reminder back and forth between us was unnecessary. He knew he had raised me to be just...
Life in a Bag

Life in a Bag

She must have seen my fidgeting. I didn’t even have to ask. She reached into her large, shiny white patent-leather purse and pulled out a box of brand-new crayons and a full-sized coloring book. My young self was instantly rescued from the boring Sunday morning...
The Set-Up

The Set-Up

It’s largely about the set-up. Do not go into a difficult conversation with your partner without establishing a solid frame. This gives you the best chance to be heard and for the exchange to go well. 1. Ask if this is a good time. You don’t want to attempt an...
Warm Regard

Warm Regard

Are you busy trying to prove your worth to someone? Are you anxiously working to try to make someone love you? Are you calculating all the reasons why someone should see you as a good person? I hate to rain on your parade (not really), but you are putting your...
To Confront… or Not?

To Confront… or Not?

In the unfolding of psychological story, there is an intersection I have been to many times with patients … do I, now as an adult, confront the one that hurt me as a child? Do I dare break the code of silence and say aloud what happened? This dilemma is complex and...