Ginger's Blog
Never Easy — But Worth It
As my journey as a psychotherapist took me more and more into the relationship world, I simultaneously became more of a geek. I have embraced my inner scientist. Show me the data. Collect it over time. Look for patterns, systems, trends that will give both...
Grabbing the Moment
I knew it was a bit dangerous and hence, stupid. Setting an alarm on vacation. Heading to the mountain solo at daybreak. They do warn you in full font size - “You are entering a natural habitat for large wildlife – bears, elk and moose. Carry bear spray.” Of course, I...
Practicing Relationships
Do you ever wish you could practice relationships? Try new things where the stakes are low. Make mistakes, learn, come back again, make more mistakes and learn more. Stretch your comfort zone. Take in love, spit it out and be loved again anyway. Take a risk. Learn to...
Yours to Keep
“But, can I lose my gains?” sayeth multiple patients over my years as a psychotherapist. No, you can’t. You can’t unlearn what you know. You can’t turn off the lights to a dark room once you’ve found the switch. Growth is permanent. Now, can you distract, deny,...
Accountability
Who are you at your relational worst? A crazed lunatic? An ice queen? A critical tongue-lasher? Shiny Teflon? An Olympic runner? In other words, what is your favorite adaptive behavior that you learned early and use adeptly and automatically? If you don’t know, ask...
Stay in Your Lane
I am not a cyclist. Unless, of course, you count those unsightly occasional my dying in the back row of a Soul Cycle class that my daughter has convinced me to attend as “mother-daughter time.” Nope. Walking, swimming and yoga are more my taste. But, from the cyclists...
Empathy
Me too. Me too. No, it’s not about you right now. It’s about the emotional experience of the person sitting across from you. The one you claim to love and care about. But, I can relate. Isn’t that empathy? Yes and no. When you emotionally connect with another person,...
How Do You Attract Attention?
As a baby, you didn’t have to try. You were probably so damn cute that you got your share of notice. Or, you instinctively let the world know that you needed to be paid attention to. Or, at a minimum, your caretakers were around enough that you got your share because...
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